HoneyBabyyyyy + The Eclipse + The New Detroit Sign + RIP Roberto Cavalli + Annie Lennox + Iran, et al + Morgan Wallen For Prison + Boeing Burn Book + Coachella Campers > Influencers
I’m back from my maternity leave (I adopted a dog last week) and am happy to report that mommy and baby are doing just fine.*
*(the dog has a tapeworm that’s been coming out in pieces for the last week, the segments of it still movinggggggggggggggggggg)
*(she bit the vet on Thursday and had to be muzzled…and got a prescription for Trazedone)
*(she caught her tail in the patio door and everything in my apt under the 7ft mark is covered in blood splatter because she thought me chasing her around to try to stop the bleeding was a fun game. Her tail hath wag-ged my home into an episode of Dexter. The TV screen, bathroom tile, windows, every floor board, every run and rise of the staircase, every wall, the concrete outside, my headboard, my white couch… everything)
Anyway, as I type this she’s sitting under a blanket I heated up for her in the dryer. I’m going to have to budget for a towel warmer… on top of the new couch I now need to buy, and the thousands of dollars for Bad Girl Puppy School tuition I’ll be spending.
Her new name is Honey (former shelter name Riley, former real name ????), and she’s perfect.
Last issue, I gave a quick update on the never-ending stream of corruption happening in LA City, including a $400M budget deficit Mayor Bass is trying to close by 1) not being transparently audited for her own spending and 2) cutting already underfunded city services including parks, street services and repair, and the understaffed and over-crowded L.A. Animal Services.
(LAPD, of course, will not be getting their budget cut, ensuring 12 cops and a helicopter can show up to arrest two TikTokers protesting outside of Scientology’s favorite restaurant, Los Feliz’s La Poubelle.)
Anyway, as heart wrenching Honey’s viral abandonment video was when it hit my FYP, I was already stewing with more hatred for L.A. City than I could ever throw at the kids who abandoned her. L.A. is a city failed by decisions, not by funding. We are a city that could house and feed every person and animal, in thrive-able conditions that don’t compromise their health and safety, that ease transition and encourage rehabilitation and re-entry. These are the resources that we pay for, and they do not at all currently operate functionally those who need them, and most likely will not operate for us, should our future selves ever need them. “High kill” — a certain death — is the only trackable, consistent result of both L.A. City’s human and animal shelter programs.
Honey was in a single kennel with three other dogs, at an unfortunately high kill shelter. I adopted her without petting her. She was too skittish to come near me and too overwhelmed by every noise, bark, door slam, and footstep in the North Central Animal Shelter lobby. Just from walking out of the shelter, she became a completely different dog from the one I first met met. She needed silence and sleep, and only 3 days later (as post-spay anesthesia fully wore off), she thawed back to a playful puppy who is super eager to show you she knows how to sit for treats, and has zero interest in learning what the word “no” means.
The truth is, even if she’d already been adopted out by the time I got there, I was leaving there with something.
Happy Sunday —
“Wind blow too hard fuck around and knock this shit down”- G’Mac Cash (TikTok)
OJ Simpson Dies At 76 (Variety)
Jonathan Majors Gets Probation (LA Times)
RIP Showtime Streaming (The Verge)
…Or, The Fashion Industry Could Just Hire Diverse Human Models (AP)
Paris’ Pre-Olympic Problem: The Seine’s Toilet Bowl Era (CBS)
The Schappell Twins — Reading, PA’s Biggest Stars — Go Off to Heaven (USA Today)
A sad day for Mob wives and generally all lovers of giraffe, zebra, python, leopard, gator, and gold. Fashion Designer Roberto Cavalli passed away Friday at the age of 84. (W)